July 30, 2009: I must question if my recent studies of Job are to prepare me for some deep pain ahead. Yet I do not walk in fear of the pain, but I pray, Lord, that Your will would be done, that I would delight in Your ways, whatever that may be – and most of all, I want the blessing of knowing You in a greater way as I experience pain more deeply.
Now as I walk through what seemed on Friday to be the valley of the shadow of death, I stand confidently in the love of a Savior who is greater than my pain. Ironically, this seems to be what I unknowingly asked for back in July and in the days since. When I asked God to do “whatever it takes to make us men and women who love You above all else,” this isn’t what I had in mind. But it is what He purposed to draw me ever nearer to Himself.
Psalm 142:3 – “When my heart was overwhelmed within me, then Thou knewest my path.”
Psalm 36:7-9 – “How excellent is Thy lovingkindness, God! Therefore the children of men put their trust under the shadow of Thy wings. They shall be ABUNDANTLY SATISFIED with the fatness of Thy house; and Thou shall make them drink of the river of Thy pleasures, for with Thee is the fountain of life; in Thy light shall we see light.”
Psalm 18: How to fight when the enemy attacks – (1) I will love the Lord (2) I will trust the Lord (3) I will call upon the Lord (4) I will give thanks to the Lord
Psalm 23:4 – “Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for You are with me; Your rod and Your staff, they comfort me.”
Psalm 54:4 – “Behold, God is my helper; the Lord is the upholder of my life.”
Proverbs 24:16 – “If you faint in the day of adversity, your strength [faith] is small.”
Proverbs 24:26 – “Whoever gives an honest answer kisses the lips.”
The Lord has been good to me. Yesterday was a day without tears, though not without feeling. I thank you, Lord, for the last year, for the past two months, and for the events which transpired on Friday. I don’t know why You have done it. I don’t really like it. But I thank You for it, for I know that You give good gifts to Your children.
Psalm 25:4-5 – “Make me to know Your ways, O Lord: teach me Your paths. Lead me in Your truth and teach me, for You are the God of my salvation; for You I wait all the day long.”
Romans 8:28 – “We know that God causes EVERYTHING to work together for the good of those who love God and are called according to His purpose for them.”
Nehemiah 9:6 – “You are the Lord, You alone. You have made heaven, the heaven of heavens, the earth and all that is on it, and You preserve all of them.”
Matthew 28:20 – “I am with you ALWAYS, even to the end of the age.”
Philippians 1:6 – “He who has begun a good work in you will be faithful to complete it until the day of Jesus Christ.”
Isaiah 26:3-4 – “You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You, because He trusts in You. Trust in the Lord forever, for in the Lord, is everlasting strength.”
Psalm 55:22 – “Cast your burden on the Lord, and He will sustain you; He will never permit the righteous to be moved.”
Psalm 145:9 – “The Lord is good to all, and His mercy is over all that He has made.”
Psalm 145:14 – “The Lord upholds all who are falling and raises up all who are bowed down.”
Blessed be the name of the Lord! The past two days have been filled with sweet meditations of my Lord and Savior and blessed times of prayer. Though at times the lies attack, the Lord has been faithful to protect my heart and mind that in all He might be glorified.